Information for Women

What is love addiction and how do people deal with it?

What is love addiction in the sense that one becomes addicted to another person that is not a great partner? One person is chasing the other and the one being chased gives just enough to keep the addict coming back for more. Can someone explain this cycle and how is resolved. Specifically when a guy pursues a women that he is in a relationship with but she is aloof and hardly has time for him but gives him just enough to keep him coming back for more. Help

I understand completely. I was with my ex for 4 years and i chased after him and loved and cared for him and became completely addicted to him while he gave nothing back and watched me crash and burn with a grin on his face.

Im sorry to tell you but you two aren’t going to work and you know this. A relationship consists of two people, but if only one person is doing the work to keep it going then a break up is inevitable.

The sooner you walk away from this girl the sooner you will be over her and free to live your life.
My ex dumped me after putting me through hell for 4 years. This is the first time I haven’t gone crawling back to his abuse and it hurts like hell but you know what its not going to hurt for ever and soon im going to look back and think why did I waste so much time on you? That is 4 years of my life I will never get back.

When he broke up with me 5 months ago I had no friends, nothing, but 5 months later and I have more of a social circle than I ever had when I was with him.

You have to start thinking about YOU. You cant make someone want or love you. You have to accept that maybe this isn’t the person for you. Some were out there IS the person for YOU. they will respect you. be there for you and not leave all the chasing up to you.

My biggest regret is not walking away from my ex the first time he hurt me. All the pain I would have saved my self. All the years I wouldn’t have wasted crying and being miserable, I would have been some were else now off living my life doing something incredible but instead im trying to get over a broken hearth. A broken hearth which was always going to be inevitably broken by him.
Please don’t make the same mistake I did run and don’t look back.

Like getting over any addiction you keep yourself busy, you distract yourself, you surround yourself with loved ones so you don’t feel so alone, you may even need to replace the addiction with something else but replace it with something healthy like exercise, walking, swimming, computer games, reading. You eat healthy to keep your body and your mind alert and well, you get enough sleep for the same reason but you don’t over sleep and you get up everyday and go to sleep every night, write your feelings down and talk to people so you can sort everything out in your head, you don’t see or contact your addiction this will only put you back to square one, and just like getting over any addiction you may need some outside help like counseling or medication and that’s ok, you do what ever YOU need to do to move on with YOUR life.

You are make the choice to stay or leave and although our emotions can be terrible things sometimes you have to take the pain and get on with it.

when your going through hell keep going.

What if I start abusing my child?

There is a thing in my family with abuse and domestic violence. When I was little my mother used to abuse me, physically and verbally, which resulted in my 10 year old depression. Now in my 18s I think: What if I start abusing my child the same way my mum did? I read that people imitate their parents when they grow up and have children of their own. :S
I just want to be a best father. Not best, but perfect. I want to be like Bree Van de Kamp.

While it is true that some continue the cycle of abuse… it’s also true that others recognize it as a cycle and are able to break it and be good parents.

If you really want to break the cycle, and be a great parent, my suggestion would be to read up on child development, as well as different parenting styles. By studying child development, you can better understand what a child is capable of at what age, and eliminate alot of the frustration of parenting. By studying different parenting techniques, you’ll have better ways of communicating with your child than your parents had, and will be less likely to use their abusive methods.